Cougars and Pimps

I am not generally one to get all bothered by un-PC jokes...it obviously depends on who is saying it to whom, and what the context is...

For as long as I can remember, "pimp" was in our society's vocabulary...whether it was to define an individual who brokers women or use it as an action of improving an object. I always understood the argument that using this term so freely may show our acquiescence in such lifestyles. I didn't necessarily agree with this view, but I can absolutely see what these people were talking about. Ultimately, it is just a word.

However, these days, the female double entendre is "cougar". What is the difference between "pimp" and "cougar"? In light of all the Melinda Dennehys out there, how is it so funny to talk about "cougars"? If 45-year-olds going home from bars with 25-year-olds are giggled about and often become the theme of frat parties, then what's to say a 41-year-old teacher sending nude pictures via text to her 15-year-old student is abhorable?

Maybe it's from my few years of teaching and truly loving these kids that is bringing out the Mama Bear in me...making me want to protect them from such pathetic individuals. However, if we know that there is nothing ok with such Melinda Dennehy's actions, then these other so-called "cougars" should be ashamed of their actions, as well! Right?! Is the only difference between Melinda the pedophile and these other cougars the fact that these other women hit on "adults"? Because at the arbitrary age of 18, a child suddenly becomes an adult? 18-year-olds suddenly can make good judgments and think for themselves? Well, if that was the case, then why did dear Melinda get caught sexting her student?!

But is it really fair to judge ladies like Demi Moore and Susan Sarandon who seem to truly find love in a younger man? What is the difference? How can we judge them differently? I don't think it would be such a bad thing to stop looking for the humor in such actions.

For example, in college, I was guilty of going to a "Ghettofantabulous"-themed party, and more recently, my friends threw a "Mexican"-themed party where people dressed up in sombreros and mustaches. The intention was maybe to drink coronas and tequila...I have no doubt anyone is intending to hurt any race, gender, sexual orientation, etc...but with the recent uproar over the Compton Cookout at UCSD, I have to admit, everyone should probably be a little more careful.

I understand the whole "it's just a joke" perspective...but when you really think about it...is it really just a joke? When there are people saying their feelings are hurt, is tickling your fancy really worth their discomfort?

I have no answers...Of course I wish we lived in a world where we could joke about whatever we wanted, and where there could not possibly be any repercussions...I hear the first thing to go in old age is humor...this is just the beginning for me. ;)